I came up with the idea recently to start my own blog and just jot down everything, unapologetically everything. Throughout the last couple of months on my Instagram, I have been trying to add captions with some real context and meaning behind my whole day, as an emoji or a song lyric doesn't hold memories. I've come to realise what I put on Facebook and Instagram isn't really my true memories, they're edited and filtered to shit. As I started up this blog, I came across when I started this blog before. I had one unpublished post, half finished and this what I'd written.
"So I'm going to be 21 by the end of this week, 19th February and I've managed to make plans. Usually, you'd be really excited for such a big birthday because nothing that big comes after that for a while does it, just 30 I guess, then 40... That sounds so frightening. Anyways I've been in a low spell for probably the last 3/4 weeks now and although I have been able to keep myself on top a majority of the time I still don't feel right. The birthday celebrations I'm not very excited for a majority of the time, it seems to come in bursts, I'll be moping about in my room and then get a sudden rush of excitement and either run downstairs to the front room, unintentionally annoy both my parents with my childlike enthusiasm or I'll stick on Michael Jackson - The Way You Make Me Feel and have a party for one in my room. The rest of the time I'm worried about being in the right mood for my friends and family on my celebrations, wondering if I'll be able to stay upbeat throughout all of the events."